MIRACLES

There are only two ways to live your life.               One is as though nothing is a miracle.   The other is as though everything is a miracle.”  ― Albert Einstein

How do you choose to live yours?

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warm days

long visits

home safely

clean sheets

math being done

family gathers

a baptism on their anniversary

perfect Godparents

perfect gifts

beautiful spring-like days

grandmothers of two generations

many arms

warm hugs

cheese games 

all this love 

 

 

 

K – I – S – S – I – N – G

 Charming and the Artist sit’ng in a tree 

K – I – S – S – I – N – G

First comes love 

Then comes marriage 

20180617-_LFA2819then comes the Fisherman happy as can be.  .  . 

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safe travels

helping in the yard

peaceful day

sweet new chapter in our lives

air condition on these hot summer days

payment online

that preview button

new friends

time to chat

Friday texts

movie night out with the girls for her

photography goals

 

 

To have courage . . .

“To have courage whatever comes in life. . .  everything lies in that. 

– Saint Teresa of Avila

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Here’s the honest thing: I don’t know much.  I don’t know why someone’s heart beats in her father’s chest. I don’t know why after two years this one continues to heal. I don’t know why we continue to celebrate the years and life’s changing times. 

I do know this:  We are not strong because of ourselves.  We do not have courage because we are brave.  We do not do anything alone.  I still can’t say one is good without feeling gratitude from my core and saying the other. . .

Thank you, Jesus.  We are changed forever.  

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2018 Gifts

29.) Celebrating two years and 27 days

30.) hot tea in special cups by the fire

31.) little snippets of their days

32.) the younger sister helping her older sister study

33.) conversations with my oldest

34.) brisk air

35.) texts from sweet friends

36.) he can fix anything

37.) drop in visits

38.) walks through the woods

39.) laughter

40.) joyful voices from newlyweds

 

 

three years now

“Sometimes you just don’t know the value of a moment until becomes a memory.”

                                                                                                             ~  Dr. Suess  

We knew.

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Three years now since the heart beats in the Fisherman’s chest.   In silence, we remember our donor, his family, and value of the memory of those days. 

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anniversary’s

surprise visits

great school days

cooler morning

a dog that likes to be outside

relationships growing

new beginnings

long talks with the oldest

 

 

Fishing

“If the dogwoods are blooming – then the fish are biting.”                                                                                                the Fisherman

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and there he is with his line in the water.  

Gifts

youth group leaders @ my house for tea

Sunday nights up late talking to my girl

Charming . . . all smiles, and happy, and doing so well

he drives her early mornings

excitement to learn

fishing buddy for him

excitement for coming things

peaceful slow mornings

messages from the most lovely people

photographs I’ll treasure always

 

 

 

 

 

 

Zero is Best

Four days ago was the fisherman third birthday since the transplant. Yesterday we traveled for his second annual health check. 

For three nights we have celebrated this birthday week with meals fit for a king.

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and then great news comes back from transplant today . . . with rejection at 0.  

and

This is the only time in your life you want to be zero. 

On this side of the transplant life. . .  Zero is good.

Zero is best 

Zero is our hero 

and

Hurray for Zeros! 

and then I had time for a Happy Fall Y’all photograph, and Henry plopped himself right down in it. 

 So here it is . . . Happy Fall Y’all

love, me . . .  & Henry 

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birthdays to celebrate

a good school day with the youngest

dinner guests

excitement over the upcoming dance

changing weather

safe trips to and home again

great biopsy results

amazing breeze

running in soft rain

laughter in our house

homework being done

and So. . .

and So we are home home and she says she feels even better.

Even though she is doing better – our girl has a long way to go. The reality is setting in for her. Among other things. . . She has issues with the nerves in her face. We are hopeful this is temporary.

She says often, she really didn’t believe she had an accident but, when people she trusted told her did, she thought she must have. 

She tells me, she doesn’t remember any of it. 

I tell her, it’s not important. “Don’t try, I say. We know you had one and here we are. . . recovering.  Thank God”

I find, I can’t say, “she is recovering without adding the words. . .  Thank God.”  

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Through this whole ordeal . . . I can’t help but think of our Donor Family and what they must have gone through when whatever happened to our donor happened.

I can’t help but think of them being told to step into that side waiting room like we were told. . . you know those waiting rooms you see on T.V. or the movies? They are there -right off the big emergency room waiting room. . . you know it’s there but, you don’t know were it is.

This is the room set aside for news so bad the family needs privacy.  It’s all blue with light and lots of chairs.

You cling to eachother

and then first the doctors come in and tell you the news. . .

and then the Chaplin.

When we got our news. . . the room spun & my only question was “Is she alive?” I got the answer I wanted

and then because we are Catholic . . . we called for a priest.

and we asked him “to bring all his toys.” 

and we prayed to the Holy Mother and asked her for strength, and to pray for us, and ask Her Son to let us keep our daughter.

and prayed to God himself . . . and prayed, and prayed and prayed.

and when I prayed the Hail Mary I couldn’t say the ending. . . “Now and at the hour of our death”  I just couldn’t.

We went to anyone and everyone we could think of to pray. . . and you fell to your knees and prayed, and prayed without ceasing. . . and then I can’t help but say, Thank God for you.

and so when I think of our donor family. . . I know they did the same thing.

But, their prayers were answered differently then ours. . . and then they saved my husband.

and people tell me we have had a hard time. . . and we have to say, No, we have had a time . . . maybe the time of our lives – we say with a smile. We have had a time I don’t want to revisit. We have had a time where prayers were answered in exactly the way we begged our sweet Jesus to answer. . . and we know that’s not a hard time. 

Thank God 

The girl who loves music knows people were not meant to have it easy. She knows this and she “offers her struggles up” as the best nana says.

She is strong and she’s recovering.

Thank God

and I keep praying for a full recovery and will ask you to do the same. . . because I know you will.

Much love to you all,

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Gifts:

early morning run alone

quite time to share my thoughts with you

the sharp mind of our girl

work for the fisherman

hugs from my “little boys” as they walk out the door

notes of love from people I hardly know

Lucy running crazy for us bringing the dinners

the dinners – oh! my goodness the dinners filled with love

and cookies and cakes

sleeping puppy

cars that work

school being done

everyone pulling together

being home to care for our girl

 

Him & Me

“A nail is driven out by another nail; habit is overcome by habit. “

Desiderius Erasmus – Dutch PhilosopherForest for Lightroom

Some days I block myself from seeing, and then there are those days I want to hold on to it all.  A year ago seems so long ago; like an old pair of shoes cast away and forgotten.

We are moving on with this living thing, and I forget at times to record my blessings. . .  to visit this blog. I find myself counting and writing lazily only in my head.

Sometimes, I try to forget what has happened but then, I count the number of times a brother calls him Lazarus, see the many scares on his chest, count the pills taken in the pill box, mark the days until we travel again to check and recheck the blood work, biopsies, a little cold here and there. . . wash your hands, stay healthy, go to work, move on to the next thing. . . we have to get organized I say.

He says we have to live a little.

mountains Ceaser head

We take off to the mountains. . . leaving it all for another day.

I tell myself, “Count your blessing today, and not just in your head this time,

 I cannot forget to love more, live more.

and I watch him closely and I’m in awe sometimes when I see patience on that face, with a hint of his father’s dimple, that face of this man I love.

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1001 Gifts

486.) dishwasher turning

487.) laughing and talking coming from another room

488.) laundry to fold – I can’t forget this one pilled high

489.) working hands

490.) good reports of a healthy heart

491.) birthdays coming

492.) boys running all over the homestead – playing, having fun

493.) soft summer breezes

494.) brothers taking off together

495.) hard summer rains.

all Moments

I read this today:  “There is no other day. All days are present now. This moment contains all moments.”
C.S. Lewis

Kelly 6 logo and a year ago I was waiting for word of what was to come for the rest of our lives. I was getting affairs in order just in case my fisherman didn’t make it.

Just in case. . .

we had to be ready,

just in case.

I remember he asked, “are you ready for this?” . . . and I said with fake confidence, I would be.

and this past year has brought many joyful times, and I counted my blessings everyday but, didn’t have much time to share.

and then a nephew got married, and I got to photograph the joyful bride.

and I danced with my greatest love at this wedding –  never forgetting we are living on borrowed time while someone else’s heart beats in his chest.

Today,  this quote struck me and I thought of how true it is . . . there is no other time then the present – this day contains everything.

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472.) quick hellos

473.) family gathering for celebrations

474.) hugs from old friends

475.) dances with the ones you love

476.) happy glances

477.) lipstick

478.) dinners with special aunts

479.) smiles and eyes I remember so well

480.) a loving touch

481.) laughter

482.) work for ideal hands

483.) safe trips back home

484.) doctors watching carefully

485.) the fun of false eyelashes

the light

My self employed, multi talented, fisherman husband wore his electrical hat the other night, and has begun to repair this wagon wheel light for one of our much loved customers.  wagon-wheelWhen he walked away to get another tool, and I saw how he had laid things out I couldn’t help myself. I moved the table into the stream of light coming through the window, plopped down the plant and started shooting. 

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summer news

Laundry-Day-1

 It’s officially – the philosopher is a real philosopher now.  We have the proof in writing,  and it’s in latin.   He graduated in May. Our trip to Kansas was a dream come true  for me – all of us piled into the car, healthy and happy making the 1000 mile trip to collect our oldest son and see him walk in that cap and gown. For this son the summer brings: outside work in the 100 degree heat of pressure washing, yard work, fixing fences, watching over past employers who have grown old and gray, seminars and diligent studying for the next step in his college life.  

Charming is vigorous in his studies too, and has elected summer school for himself. He tells me he’s afraid if he takes the summer break he may not want to start up again. You see, school has never been his thing. But, this thing called studying – he has learned to embrace; he studies, and studies, and studies so one would never know his truth. His true love is working with his hands. He’s an artist, a people person.  He knows he must pay the debt now and get the job called schooling done.  

The girl who loves music has graduated from our little homeschool, being the third graduate under this roof. This girl, the girl who just graduated from high school two weeks ago, the girl who loves music has 27 college credits under her belt.  She plans to continue at the local college and earn her first degree – just as her brothers have done. All to soon we will be packing up the car to take her to the college of her choice.  She has started working at a little pizza shop, and you know what?  She likes it.  Of course she does – there must be music playing in the restaurant. 

The girl with the dancing feet is on a break because the dancing school is closed for the month of June.  She’s getting itchy though and has started to practice by moving tables and chairs and embracing her tap shoes once again – tapping on anything that makes a sound.  Tap . . . Tap . . . Tap

The fisherman is still doing so very well – transplant – (that’s Emory talk for our team of organ transplant doctors who watch over the fisherman)  are watching very closely. They are still calling for blood work every week or two. We make the 150 mile trip grabbing coffee in the early morning ride . .. . get stuck in the early morning commute  – he gives the sample with a smile, and then back on the road grabbing lunch at any new little joint we can find . . . and then home by 4. 

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Gifts 

425.) paying bills on time

426.) knowing what’s right

427.) everyone home working together

428.) clean cars

429.) doctors watching so close

430.) girls who can do shopping

431.) love notes from little hands

432.) doors wide open

433.) books to read

434.) coloring time with my girl

435.) phone calls for work

436.) people always asking . . . how is he?

437.) the answer . . . he’s so good

438.) new beginnings

439.) hard working hands

440.) people who really love me

441.) tapping